Yesterday, I fell over. I was trying to follow along in a yoga class. The instructor had us on our hands and knees (I can do that). Then we had to extend our left arm out in front of us (totally fine). Then we had to extend our left leg out behind us (that was the problem). I fell right over.
The deep metaphor of “balance (and imbalance) includes ideas of equilibrium, adjusting, maintaining or offsetting forces, and things as they should be.”*
Balance shows up in four areas of our life – physical, emotional, social, and moral. Physical can look like falling over in a yoga pose or eating a balanced diet. Emotional balance can sound like “I’m feeling out of sorts” or “I’m back on track!” Social balance often shows up as good teamwork and collaboration. Moral balance can sound like “Life is not fair!” or “She got what he deserved.” It always reminds me of that Martin Luther King, Jr. quote, “The arc of the moral universe is long, but bends toward justice.”
For single mom’s, imbalance is baked into the equation. We are mom. We are not dad. I tried to be mom and dad, and it doesn’t work. Why? Because you can’t be two people at once. The natural balance won’t allow it.
To keep ourselves from falling over, it’s important to be aware of when we are starting to wobble.
Check your Balance Exercise: I’ve found that It’s much easier to tell when things are out of balance than when they are in balance. For this exercise, pay attention to your surroundings. Do you feel like your house is in disarray or tidy? How about your health? How have you been eating lately? And you social circle? Feeling like you are getting enough adult time? Balance is not a fixed state, it’s fluid. We have to go with the flow, but also know when we are starting to wobble.
As always, this is a rough-cut excerpt from a book I’m writing about how to change your narrative as a single mom. How’s it going for you?
*Marketing Metaphoria, Zaltman and Zaltman